Looking Back on My Sabbatical
Being free to explore, go on adventures, and push my limits
I haven't opened up online on a personal level in who knows how many years. But it's been a big year for me and I felt that I wanted to share it. Hopefully, it may resonate with you too.
I’ve separated the story into two parts. This first one is an overview of the past year, while the second focuses on how I got over burnout.
Last March I kicked off my one-year sabbatical. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines a sabbatical as: "a break or change from a normal routine (as of employment)". That's exactly what I was looking for. I felt stuck and bored with my routine. Life felt gray from all the staying at home, having a limited range of possible activities, and not being able to meet new people.
You see, I've always loved Madrid. And I moved here right before lockdown. After the pandemic, Madrid and I now have a love/hate relationship. I projected onto Madrid my frustrations of being stuck in a boring routine. The only way out was to spend some time away. Travelling is a vital part of my life. I love exploring new places and I missed it so much. Now it could become a priority once again.
At the same time, I was (and still am) going through a big introspection phase. There are moments when different abstract ideas suddenly become tangible. Things start to click kicking off a snowball effect of non-stop self-growth. It reminds me of Inside Out when the main character gets a more advanced control panel for her emotions. I now needed the time and space to explore these new ideas and what they meant for me and my future.
So, after thinking it through, I decided to take the leap and quit a nice job at Polygon Hermez. I spent the first month resting, finding a new routine, and figuring out where I was and where I was heading. I started a habit of working on different projects. Low expectations, and prioritising the fun aspect. As it was a new habit, I started with a short time per day. This fitted well with travelling being the main priority.
I only had one trip planned: 2 months in North America. One thing I haven't talked about is how obsessed I've become with New York City. If I could spend a significant period of time somewhere that wasn't Madrid, it would be in NYC. As I can't get a visa, I’ve been travelling there a lot lately.
I also did a couple of road trips with my friend Loli. The US is a great country for road trips. I mean, it was designed for cars. The first one was around the south: Nashville, Memphis, New Orleans, and Montgomery/Selma. We were fully immersed in the musical history and civil rights movement via movies, shows, music, Wikipedia articles and museums. The second trip took us from Edmonton, Canada (where we visited our friend Elena) to the Canadian Rockies, and onwards to Vancouver and Seattle.
Then Summer arrived, and I love Summer. I filled it up with trips, music festivals, and hanging out back home by the Mediterranean. It was all the Summer specific things we couldn’t do the past couple of years due to the pandemic. And it was the best Summer in years. This was the "go crazy and let go" part of the sabbatical.
The day after my birthday, I flew to Tanzania. A lifelong dream of mine was to climb Kilimanjaro, ever since I read a children's book when I was a kid. But why now? While I loved my trip to North America, I did so partly because it’s comfortable and easy to travel around. I was running away from discomfort. What better way to change that than climbing the highest mountain I’ll probably ever climb. And the experience pushed the whole group to our limits. I was so proud of us. I couldn’t help tearing up as I reached the top after what we went through.
Tanzania was my holiday from the sabbatical. I only took my phone without a SIM card to disconnect as much as possible. I like to do this every so often, and 4 years had passed since the last time. I don't know if you've tried disconnecting from the digital world for a significant amount of time. At least for me, I notice my anxiety levels going down after the first few days. And they immediately go back up as soon as I pick up my phone again. During the 7-day Kilimanjaro climb, I didn't even have WiFi. It felt peaceful. The information about the Queen's passing still reached us, though a day late.
On the way back home, I had a long layover in Dubai. I spent 6h from 11pm to 5am walking around the city. I even made it in time to go up the Burj Khalifa. Dubai is easy to walk around, which surprised me. At night, it's still very warm, but manageable and it was still busy. It was a fun little adventure.
I wasn’t done yet. 3 days after returning from Tanzania, I flew to Trondheim, Norway. I met up with my parents there. We hadn't travelled together in 16 years. I value my time with them more since I read this Tim Urban post. We rented a car and drove to the Lofoten Islands. The aim was to enjoy together this beautiful corner of our planet and to catch the Northern Lights (another bucket list item). We saw the auroras 4 times!
At this point, I noticed I had been to 29 countries in total so I decided to get to 30 during this sabbatical. It would be funny for San Marino to be number 30, the last tiny country in Europe I had left. So last week, I made my way to San Marino and Italy with my friend Alvaro. As expected, it was beautiful and we had excellent food. Alvaro even says he had the best pizza of his life in San Marino.
Travelling is not only about exploration and seeking adventures. Each trip had a singular focus. Being in new places and outside our day-to-day, if we're looking, can show us new perspectives on both ourselves and the world. I travelled in the middle of an intense self-growth phase. My introspection was triggered by noticing the big disconnect between myself and my inner child. I wanted to be curious and playful again, finding the fun and joy in things. I've been pushing that approach everywhere: at home, in my travels, and while working.
Tanzania and Kilimanjaro were incredible experiences. But both were tough. Kilimanjaro for obvious reasons. Tanzania due to the fact that I had never been in that part of the world nor exposed to the culture. It was nothing serious, but it did point out how accustomed I had become to life's comforts. I settled into a nice apartment in Madrid. I decorated it to my taste with nice furniture. I would go out to nice places and travel comfortably. I started to notice that I was saying yes or no to the wrong things and missing out on possible adventures. Even having a nice apartment was holding me back as it became a limiting factor when deciding where to travel or spend some significant time.
More recently, I became aware of how my overthinking and self-consciousness were weighing on my shoulders. I tend to feel the need to be in control of every situation and know what's going on. I cared too much about what others may or not think of me. I needed to let this bad habit loose if I wanted to feel free, connect with my inner child, and be myself in any context. This will take time. It requires a lot of unlearning. I'm happy that I notice it more often and I'm able to act accordingly when I do.
While I've enjoyed the excitement of seeing so many new places, I'm also tired. Being on the road is mentally taxing. My sleep rhythm is all over the place. I both don't and do want to stop. In the end, I decided to take a break from travelling to focus on building things as this was my other priority for the sabbatical. In Part Two, I’ll share more of what I’ve been up to on that front.
Thanks to Monica for the help reviewing this.